people love my brother.
he’s articulate.
decisive.
the kind of man who never seems to have to make an effort.
he walks into rooms and they rearrange themselves around him.
i’ve seen him dismantle someone with a sentence.
polite voice.
careful phrasing.
no visible blood.
i’ve also seen him pay our parents’ bills without mentioning it.
show up when things break.
fix things no one else even noticed were cracking.
he signed me up for together at last like it was a practical decision.
like i was a problem to be optimized.
like my future needed supervision.
i was furious.
i still am.
but i also know he thinks he’s saving me.
that’s the complicated part.
he can be ruthless.
i’ve watched him hold his ground until the other person folded.
he doesn’t flinch.
he doesn’t bend.
he wins.
and then there are the butterflies.
i wasn’t supposed to see that.
a different cadence.
not unkind.
not exactly gentle either.
but not pinning them.
like he was choosing something.
maybe that’s what power actually looks like.
not cruelty.
not kindness.
but the ability to choose which one to deploy.
he tells me he wants the best for me.
he says i deserve stability.
he says he won’t let me end up with someone who hurts me.
i don’t know if that’s love or jurisdiction.
maybe that’s what siblings are.
someone who believes they know
what’s best for you
even when you don’t.